“My final hour is at hand. We face an enemy more numerous and cunning than the world has yet seen. Remember your training, and do not fear these unholy hordes. I shall cast the first stone. That will be your sign to attack! But you shall not fight this enemy with stones. No! RAZOR GLANDES! Aim for the eyes! May the Lord have mercy, for we shall show none!“  -Jesus the Noodler (not the real Jesus)