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Unexpected skills (Read 1471 times)
IronGoober
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...and now, No. 1, the
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Unexpected skills
Feb 7th, 2021 at 5:21pm
 
I love this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ub0Nl4HPFGA

Anyone know what it's from?
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John R.
 
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NooneOfConsequence
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #1 - Feb 7th, 2021 at 6:13pm
 
Thatís hilarious!  No idea what itís from.
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ďMy final hour is at hand. We face an enemy more numerous and cunning than the world has yet seen. Remember your training, and do not fear the hordes of Judas. I, without sin, shall cast the first stone. That will be your sign to attack! But you shall not fight this unholy enemy with stones. No! RAZOR GLANDES!† Aim for the eyes! May the Lord have mercy, for we shall show none!ď† -Jesus the Noodler
 
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vetryan15
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #2 - Feb 7th, 2021 at 7:28pm
 
WTF. lol.
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Oxnate
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #3 - Feb 7th, 2021 at 10:35pm
 
Found another copy and the comments say it's from "Le Barzellette" - The Jokes.

https://youtu.be/rkGIEt1o9m4
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Sorry, but it's a pet peeve of mine:  'Yea' isn't the word you want.  It's 'yeah'.  'Yea' is an anachronistic word you see in the King James bible. "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of Spellcheck, I shall fear no misspellings for thou art with me.  Thy dictionary and thy thesaurus, they comfort me.
 
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Tomas
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #4 - Feb 8th, 2021 at 10:40am
 
Amazing
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Morphy
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #5 - Feb 9th, 2021 at 5:19pm
 
Too funny  Cheesy
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xud9a - call me zud 👍
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #6 - Feb 18th, 2021 at 12:17pm
 
First saw it as a cartoon and text In a long forgotten rag mag 30 odd years ago. The farmer had a zummerzett drawl and the donkey had an udder, in fact it was a cow .
The next joke was about the naive milkmaid milking the bull !!!
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Morphy
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #7 - Feb 19th, 2021 at 5:29pm
 
So as usual I am about to derail this thread to actual unexpected skills. Hey...Ive done it for 10 years...why stop now?


This is going to sound really odd but I am *really* good at acting naive or ignorant. LOL.

I know you are thinking "just acting?" But seriously its an excellent way to see through people and gauge their true motives. This is something I never talk about IRL. Nobody knows this but those who read it here. Nobody lol...but its very freeing to actually say it.

When someone is trying to manipulate me I usually see it and they almost never know I do. Ive worked around a lot of very sketchy characters who were expert manipulators. Usually shot callers, gangbangers and addicts. I got good at the whole game without looking like I am.

The other skill I have which Ive never met anyone better at is keeping secrets when someone ask me to keep their confidence. People tell me things because I have a very firm rule never to break their trust unless they are stupid enough to tell me a legal issue that will get me set up for an accessory charge.

In the last 6 months I had a conversation with someone involving both of us confiding things that were personal. That person immediately went and told people. I never returned the favor although I couldve and it was far worse. Thats my rule and its just a thing I do. Not even so much for other people. I have certain lines I dont cross because I feel like if I did I would be losing a part of me. I started this about 5 years ago and so far havent broken that rule.

These are unusual skills to cultivate but they have served me well throughout the years.
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Martin_Greywolf
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #8 - Feb 20th, 2021 at 7:50am
 
IronGoober wrote on Feb 7th, 2021 at 5:21pm:
I love this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ub0Nl4HPFGA

Anyone know what it's from?


It's from Europe in general, I first heard the joke from my grandfather almost 30 years ago - well, slightly less racy version with cow udders as opposed to donkey balls. We have church towers with clocks literally every ~5 kilometers.
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NooneOfConsequence
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #9 - Feb 20th, 2021 at 8:57am
 
@Morphy, Is it really derailing a post if your post actually fits the title better than the original post?

I think maybe you un-self-derailed the post Morphy?  Re-railed perhaps? 

For me, I love collecting skills... useful or otherwise. I never learned to whistle as a kid, but I taught myself to do it in my 30ís. I learned to juggle a couple years ago... just because it was relatively easy to learn and I never had. Iíve done the same with 3D printing, slinging, cooking with various methods, picking locks, leatherwork, woodworking, and so on. Before the pandemic I was learning Spanish and Toki Pona. Why?  Probably because my brain gets bored if Iím not learning something. I donít know. Learning itself is sort of a meta-skill... the skill of learning skills.

Nice hijack Morphy. The donkey ball thing was briefly funny, but itís not something to engage in conversation on for long. I like your redirection.
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ďMy final hour is at hand. We face an enemy more numerous and cunning than the world has yet seen. Remember your training, and do not fear the hordes of Judas. I, without sin, shall cast the first stone. That will be your sign to attack! But you shall not fight this unholy enemy with stones. No! RAZOR GLANDES!† Aim for the eyes! May the Lord have mercy, for we shall show none!ď† -Jesus the Noodler
 
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NooneOfConsequence
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #10 - Feb 20th, 2021 at 9:32am
 
Morphy wrote on Feb 19th, 2021 at 5:29pm:
This is going to sound really odd but I am *really* good at acting naive or ignorant. LOL.


Thatís a good one!  You are basically weaponizing a personís ego against them by allowing them to think they are superior to you long enough to get what you want.
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ďMy final hour is at hand. We face an enemy more numerous and cunning than the world has yet seen. Remember your training, and do not fear the hordes of Judas. I, without sin, shall cast the first stone. That will be your sign to attack! But you shall not fight this unholy enemy with stones. No! RAZOR GLANDES!† Aim for the eyes! May the Lord have mercy, for we shall show none!ď† -Jesus the Noodler
 
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Curious Aardvark
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #11 - Feb 20th, 2021 at 9:40am
 
slinging is probably the most unexpected skill we all share.

Generally when you mention it you just get blank stares.
It's usually not until you pull a sling from your back pocket and mention david and goliath that the penny drops.

Like noc I tend to collect skills.
Apart from languages we seem to have a similiar skill set. I'll add yo-yo to mine.
As well as sausage making, food smoking (hot and cold) and charcuterie in general.

Various martial arts

But I suspect with us all it's the slinging that is always the most unexpected.
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Do All things with Honour and Generosity: Regret Nothing, Envy None, Apologise Seldom and Bow your head to No One †- works for me Smiley
 
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Morphy
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #12 - Feb 20th, 2021 at 9:43am
 
NooneOfConsequence wrote on Feb 20th, 2021 at 9:32am:
Morphy wrote on Feb 19th, 2021 at 5:29pm:
This is going to sound really odd but I am *really* good at acting naive or ignorant. LOL.


Thatís a good one!† You are basically weaponizing a personís ego against them by allowing them to think they are superior to you long enough to get what you want.


Yep. Just the other day I was a little tipsy. First time Ive had a drink in a loooong time. Ok full disclosure I was trashed. A person from work called me up to try and get me to torpedo my Capt. on my way out. I feigned ignorance as usual. She has a bit of an ego and fancies herself a good manipulator. I played up the drunk oaf of course, forcing her to keep reverting focus towards her real goal. She tried to be subtle but she was a bit heavy handed.

The next day in texts I pretended not to remember the conversation. Once again she brought it back to torpedoing my capt but always with noble sounding phrases and "Im so proud of you Josh for dealing with all these brutal calls and horrible people, but dont forget to let Chief know about Capt! Youre such a good paramedic blah blah pfft. Hilarious.

So i agreed of course and let him know people were out to get him. But I never tell names or secrets so it cant be traced back to me. I also was able to leave a little surprise for the lady that gave me so many problems. should be hilarious when that whole thing blows up.

The hardest thing Ive found about the whole thing is swallowing your own pride and never revealing this stuff to anyone. Or else then you lose much of your advantage. Which is why this is the first time Ive ever mentioned this to anyone.
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IronGoober
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...and now, No. 1, the
larch...

Posts: 1374
California
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #13 - Feb 20th, 2021 at 2:34pm
 
Martin_Greywolf wrote on Feb 20th, 2021 at 7:50am:
It's from Europe in general, I first heard the joke from my grandfather almost 30 years ago - well, slightly less racy version with cow udders as opposed to donkey balls. We have church towers with clocks literally every ~5 kilometers.


Good to know. I have to admit, the less racy version isn't quite as funny to me. Not sure why. ... I guess becaue there's lots of good reasons to go and touch a cow udder, but much fewer to put your hands on a donkey scrotum. lol.
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John R.
 
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Slyngorm
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Re: Unexpected skills
Reply #14 - Feb 20th, 2021 at 5:23pm
 
That...................................... sound....... when he touches the...................................................


Also I used to be able to destroy computers by simply using them.
I lost this power when I left high school  Cry
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