If we're going into medical field work grumbles...
"Hi could you help me? I need to phone my mother so she can come and pick me up and take me to the train station. Do you know where I can find her number?"
This is the 4th time you've asked C_____. You're 87 years old and your mother has been dead for 40 years. You don't have anywhere to go except to the dining room. Food is coming in 10 mins.
It's always fun seeing the students or cover workers unfamiliar with our residents hear E____ start screaming for help for the first time. The way she screams you'd think she was on the floor with a bleeding head wound. They always look super shocked and concerned when I react by sighing and slowly lifting myself out of my seat in the break room and casually strolling to her room to find her, as always, sat perfectly fine in her armchair. Everything for her is a catastrophe so I've found trivializing her worries actually helps calm her down rather playing into her belief that she needs me to come running in to save the day. Somehow I'm still her favourite.
Then of course they'll also hear A____ who will also be screaming but with more expletives and in a way that sounds like she's the one doing the attacking. We then have to explain she's just shouting at the TV or at the hallucinations she tries to drown out with her TV and radio at full blast. It's at this point they start looking around as if they've only now realised what a mistake it was to come here. Then C____ will barge her way into the break room to ask if we can phone her mother.
What is this all over the floor? It's sort of fluffy... Oh. It's the inside lining of a diaper that's been torn out and thrown around the room. Again. Please R_____, this is the third time we've changed it today, stop ripping it up, the entire bed is soaked. Again.
"Where am I?"
You're in _______, you live here now because you couldnt look after yourself alone at home.
"Älä puhuu paska, mä haluan mennä kotiin nyt heti!"
(I'm interested to see what Google Translate does with that
)
You've been living here for 5 weeks now...