Semi Azas
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...that I didn't think to type "slinging.org" into the address bar before I started my google search.
But, who would have thought?
So, it all started some months ago while reading a Steven Pressfield novel. I was about halfway through the book, and the image of egyptian slingers just kept returning into the forefront of my brain. I mean, I'd page through whole chapters only to come to the end and realize I'd no idea what I'd just read. I was too busy fantasizing about pelting angry greeks in the head with bulbous slingstones.
This preternatural obsession quickly bled over into my work and social-life, too. "What's that, honey? What'd you say? Sling who in the head with what?" Yeah, I found myself saying things frighteningly akin to that, and far too often.
And work? How'd you like to be flipping through a patient's chart and happen upon an assessment like:
"Awake, alert, oriented (x3). Lungs are clear to auscultation bilaterally. Abdomen soft, distended, possibly pelted with slingstones. Bowel sounds are present to four quadrants. No pressure wave is palpable. Die, heathen Greek dog, DIE! Slings are 2+ bilaterally. Pharynx 1+injected. There are no exudates..."
You get the picture.
Yes, rationally minded people usually do seek professional counselling at times like these. NOT ME! I chose to hold counsel with the internet, and now I'm here.
And GOD almighty, along with his tabernacle of electronic angels that are responsible for what I like to call "THE INTERNET," have decided to teach me (oh, humble me, unworthy me) exactly how to make...
...hold on, I'm getting a little weepy here...
...MY VERY OWN SLING!!!!!!!
Ah, sweet, sweet friggen joy.
As soon as I get that dirty macrame gig down (it'll be lots easier as soon as I can stop giggling insanely), all filthy heathen Pelopenessians will have true cause to fear.
Mark my words.
And, oh...thanks and hi, too.
-semi
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