Slinging.org Forum
https://slinging.org/forum/YaBB.pl
General >> Other Topics >> Insults
https://slinging.org/forum/YaBB.pl?num=1635086574

Message started by NooneOfConsequence on Oct 24th, 2021 at 10:42am

Title: Insults
Post by NooneOfConsequence on Oct 24th, 2021 at 10:42am
Let’s just skip the politics and go straight to your best ad hominem!

No curse words or sexually explicit phrases.  Keep those insults clean-ish, and don’t direct them at a specific person.

I’d give you my best insult, but I’m not going to waste my time on a bunch of tree hating Nazi-sympathizing puppy kickers like you.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Hirtius on Oct 24th, 2021 at 10:51am
Long ago I found on a random insult generator ‘sordid peanut’, it became an instant classic.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Kick on Oct 24th, 2021 at 11:00am
You can tell he's an engineer wanting to streamline the forum content.

I think it has been copied, emulated, retold and reconfigured multiple times over the course of human history but
"I think very poorly of you."
"That's funny I don't think about you at all."
is so biting, cruel and dismissive whilst appearing completely innocuous. It's one of my favourites.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by NooneOfConsequence on Oct 24th, 2021 at 11:10am

Kick wrote on Oct 24th, 2021 at 11:00am:
You can tell he's an engineer wanting to streamline the forum content.

I think it has been copied, emulated, retold and reconfigured multiple times over the course of human history but
"I think very poorly of you."
"That's funny I don't think about you at all."
is so biting, cruel and dismissive whilst appearing completely innocuous. It's one of my favourites.


My favorite variant of this is to call someone “padawan” when they think they’re saying something important. It doesn’t sound like an insult, but it’s very insulting when the person thinks they are already a Jedi 🤣

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Morphy on Oct 24th, 2021 at 11:43am
Your mom.  :thumb:

Title: Re: Insults
Post by IronGoober on Oct 24th, 2021 at 2:58pm

Morphy wrote on Oct 24th, 2021 at 11:43am:
Your mom.  :thumb:

Best one. Can't top it. Can also be used in ANY situation. 
e.g.
1."Want some cheese?"
2." Your mom."

Bam. Done.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Morphy on Oct 24th, 2021 at 4:25pm

IronGoober wrote on Oct 24th, 2021 at 2:58pm:

Morphy wrote on Oct 24th, 2021 at 11:43am:
Your mom.  :thumb:

Best one. Can't top it. Can also be used in ANY situation. 
e.g.
1."Want some cheese?"
2." Your mom."

Bam. Done.


Or one thing I liked to do as a dumb teen was to add the phrase “last night” to whatever is being your mom’ed.

“Hey bro, you want some cheese?”

“Your mom wanted cheese last night!”

or

“We’’re calling about your cars extended warranty…”

“Your mom was calling about my warranty, last night.”

You see, it makes no sense at all but people will always add there own meaning.  :D

Title: Re: Insults
Post by joe_meadmaker on Oct 24th, 2021 at 9:19pm

Morphy wrote on Oct 24th, 2021 at 4:25pm:
“We’’re calling about your cars extended warranty…”

“Your mom was calling about my warranty, last night.”

;D

Title: Re: Insults
Post by IronGoober on Oct 24th, 2021 at 9:41pm
I'm not gonna lie, I was going to write "Your mom wanted cheese", but saying "Your mom wanted cheese last night" is so much more effective.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by TheMightyAslan on Oct 25th, 2021 at 5:40am
my favourites are insults that may not be directly perceived as insults.

"great job bro, you're really showing off that double digit IQ!"

"WOW THANKS!"

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Kick on Oct 25th, 2021 at 8:44am
I once fell out with a friend for like 2 weeks because me and another friend turned everything he said into a "your mum" joke. I mean everything, whether it made grammatical or logical sense or not". "Hi guys what's happening?" "Your mum was happening last night!" "What lesson do we have after English?" (we were in school) "Your mum had a lesson after English!" "Have you seen the new Spider-Man film?" "Your mum has seen the new Spider-Man film last night!"

Drove him nuts. We thought it was hilarious until he got really pissed off at us. Got to be honest, kind of made it funnier.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Sir Missalot on Oct 25th, 2021 at 10:28am
Oh, I'm sorry, were you still talking?  (Reserved for incessant yammerers who can't stop talking because they forgot their original thought)

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Sir Missalot on Oct 25th, 2021 at 10:39am
... or just smiling and nodding, because the most meaningful insults are the ones one keeps to ones self.  ;)

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Rat Man on Oct 26th, 2021 at 8:05am
   When I was in the army there was a custom where one would insult his best friends.  The more you liked the person the worse the insults.  I suppose the custom has been around as long as there were armies and they're probably still doing it today.  After a while you were very good at it. It became an art form.  The funniest part was watching a civilian like a girlfriend or wife who wasn't accustomed to it listening in.  They would be horrified. 

Title: Re: Insults
Post by NooneOfConsequence on Oct 26th, 2021 at 8:28am
Men say “I love you” by insulting each other. I like to point this out to other men, and then look them straight in the eye with a deadpan, say their name, followed by “I love you”.

Awkward 🐢

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Morphy on Oct 26th, 2021 at 10:01am

NooneOfConsequence wrote on Oct 26th, 2021 at 8:28am:
Men say “I love you” by insulting each other. I like to point this out to other men, and then look them straight in the eye with a deadpan, say their name, followed by “I love you”.

Awkward 🐢


This is a step up from a fish. Not a huge step but its progress.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by NooneOfConsequence on Oct 26th, 2021 at 11:01am

Morphy wrote on Oct 26th, 2021 at 10:01am:

NooneOfConsequence wrote on Oct 26th, 2021 at 8:28am:
Men say “I love you” by insulting each other. I like to point this out to other men, and then look them straight in the eye with a deadpan, say their name, followed by “I love you”.

Awkward 🐢


This is a step up from a fish. Not a huge step but its progress.


Fish slap… classic!

Title: Re: Insults
Post by xud9a - call me zud 👍 on Oct 26th, 2021 at 12:09pm
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the armpit of those you love.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by NooneOfConsequence on Oct 26th, 2021 at 2:15pm

xud9a - call me zud 👍 wrote on Oct 26th, 2021 at 12:09pm:
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the armpit of those you love.


Oh… we’re moving into curses now. I like it!

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Rat Man on Oct 26th, 2021 at 3:39pm
   When you were born they threw away the baby and kept the afterbirth.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Curious Aardvark on Oct 26th, 2021 at 4:47pm
A multi gender interchangeable curse:
May your testicles/breasts (use as appropriate) turn to concrete, drop off and break both your ankles.



Title: Re: Insults
Post by Greenjay on Oct 27th, 2021 at 1:52am
You're a nothing,you where born a nothing,and when you die only your fleas will mourn you.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by J on Oct 28th, 2021 at 1:34pm
The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Lightning Jack on Oct 28th, 2021 at 5:17pm

Rat Man wrote on Oct 26th, 2021 at 3:39pm:
   When you were born they threw away the baby and kept the afterbirth.


Couldn’t that just be simplified to “You were aborted”?
(Not trying to start an argument)

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Lightning Jack on Oct 28th, 2021 at 6:23pm
You never saw Jack coming, because you got struck by Lightning. ;D

Title: Re: Insults
Post by NooneOfConsequence on Oct 28th, 2021 at 9:11pm

wrote on Oct 28th, 2021 at 5:17pm:

Rat Man wrote on Oct 26th, 2021 at 3:39pm:
   When you were born they threw away the baby and kept the afterbirth.


Couldn’t that just be simplified to “You were aborted”?
(Not trying to start an argument)


Dude… you just took a fun thread and killed it. That was neither funny nor an insult… but you just sucked the fun right out of it.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by NooneOfConsequence on Oct 28th, 2021 at 9:13pm

AncientCraftwork wrote on Oct 28th, 2021 at 1:34pm:
The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God


I don’t think you understood the assignment J. Is that an insult? It just looks like a saying from the Bible.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Lightning Jack on Oct 28th, 2021 at 10:10pm

NooneOfConsequence wrote on Oct 28th, 2021 at 9:11pm:

wrote on Oct 28th, 2021 at 5:17pm:

Rat Man wrote on Oct 26th, 2021 at 3:39pm:
   When you were born they threw away the baby and kept the afterbirth.


Couldn’t that just be simplified to “You were aborted”?
(Not trying to start an argument)


Dude… you just took a fun thread and killed it. That was neither funny nor an insult… but you just sucked the fun right out of it.


I was merely pointing out how stupid of an insult that is. I don’t understand why someone would waste their time making up insults that don’t make any sense anyway (and that’s true for most everyone not just Ratman).

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Hirtius on Oct 28th, 2021 at 10:18pm

NooneOfConsequence wrote on Oct 28th, 2021 at 9:11pm:
Dude… you just took a fun thread and killed it. That was neither funny nor an insult… but you just sucked the fun right out of it.


Yeah, that’s not the first time.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Lightning Jack on Oct 28th, 2021 at 10:27pm

NooneOfConsequence wrote on Oct 28th, 2021 at 9:13pm:

AncientCraftwork wrote on Oct 28th, 2021 at 1:34pm:
The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God


I don’t think you understood the assignment J. Is that an insult? It just looks like a saying from the Bible.


It is not “just a saying” it is from Psalm 14:1
 
    “The fool hath said in his heart, there is no God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, There is none that doeth good.”
‭‭Psalm‬ ‭14:1‬ ‭KJV‬‬

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Hirtius on Oct 28th, 2021 at 10:35pm

wrote on Oct 28th, 2021 at 10:10pm:
I was merely pointing out how stupid of an insult that is. I don’t understand why someone would waste their time making up insults that don’t make any sense anyway (and that’s true for most everyone not just Ratman).


I agree it’s a bit crude and not a good insult (sorry Ratman), but I think you kind of are missing the point. Ratman was trying to say “you’re worthless” in a creative way. Coming up with insults is fun, you’re trying to be creative or witty.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by NooneOfConsequence on Oct 28th, 2021 at 10:50pm
Yup.  We’ve gone from insults to “explaining”. I declare this thread dead.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Lightning Jack on Oct 28th, 2021 at 10:51pm
Well maybe we should be using this creativeness for something more positive or maybe slinging instead of these insults. Over the last month I’ve noticed that more people have been posting in the off topics board instead of the slinging board. I think that we should try to actually talk about slinging and take a break from the off topics board for awhile. I think the off topics board needs some cool down time.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by NooneOfConsequence on Oct 28th, 2021 at 11:16pm

wrote on Oct 28th, 2021 at 10:51pm:
Well maybe we should be using this creativeness for something more positive or maybe slinging instead of these insults. Over the last month I’ve noticed that more people have been posting in the off topics board instead of the slinging board. I think that we should try to actually talk about slinging and take a break from the off topics board for awhile. I think the off topics board needs some cool down time.


D9930BA1-B5C0-4791-93FA-4C967530F9F5.jpeg (56 KB | 14 )

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Hirtius on Oct 28th, 2021 at 11:58pm

wrote on Oct 28th, 2021 at 10:51pm:
Well maybe we should be using this creativeness for something more positive or maybe slinging instead of these insults. Over the last month I’ve noticed that more people have been posting in the off topics board instead of the slinging board. I think that we should try to actually talk about slinging and take a break from the off topics board for awhile. I think the off topics board needs some cool down time.


That’s fair, but you’re posting in here too. And aren’t witty phrases and insults a part of slinging? The ancients put such things on their bullets, they obviously got a kick out of it.

Obviously the off topics area has gotten a bit congested and tense. Hell, I’ve contributed to it. But I will point out that you have derailed two threads that were meant to bring a lighthearted discussion to ease tensions in off topic.


Sorry about your thread NOOC, you hot dog loving trash slinger.

Edit: Aw, we replaced the swear words. That’s awful, my last insult had a good pun (or double entendre?). Oh well, I improvised.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Sir Missalot on Oct 29th, 2021 at 6:47am
You’re nothing but a zig-zag interlocked double loop dogshank!

<noodle!>

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Morphy on Oct 29th, 2021 at 6:52am
To the pain


https://youtu.be/I_keWS1i3RA

Title: Re: Insults
Post by NooneOfConsequence on Oct 29th, 2021 at 7:27am

Sir Missalot wrote on Oct 29th, 2021 at 6:47am:
You’re nothing but a zig-zag interlocked double loop dogshank!

<noodle!>


Yes!  Sir Missalot understood the assignment 😆

Perhaps the thread could still cone back from the dead. A zombie insult thread works for me!


Morphy wrote on Oct 29th, 2021 at 6:52am:
To the pain


https://youtu.be/I_keWS1i3RA


Morphy… I love you.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Caldou on Nov 4th, 2021 at 6:27am
Oh boy, it was a long time since I was trying to be insulting, I now have kids, I must take care of my language...

Do you take also international or are those puddles on the floor your brains already leaking when trying to understand your own language ?

Bande d'abrutis de yacks confits à la graisse de scolopendres dégénérés, rebuts rétrogrades de fistules purulentes, raclures de pustules irrémédiablement moisies...

That's all for now, it should took you all long enough to understand those !






This whole post is purposely insultiv only to put the topic back on tracks, I usually think that, even though most of y'all are native english speaker you all have at least 2 connecting brain cells between all of you... OOps, I did it again !

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Morphy on Nov 4th, 2021 at 7:30am
The other day I was at a persons home for a possible seizure and I asked the lady who witnessed it if she was the patient's mother. Whoops. That was dumb. She was his wife.

Then I asked when she was expecting. Whoops again. Ok, the second part didnt happen but wouldve been pretty funny in a horrible way. The first part did and I felt pretty stupid.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Sir Missalot on Nov 4th, 2021 at 8:01am
I do tech support...

You have a critical malfunction in the primary organic information processing unit located between the keyboard and the chair.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Sir Missalot on Nov 4th, 2021 at 8:04am
She's pathologically incapable of following the simplest of instructions.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Sir Missalot on Nov 4th, 2021 at 8:06am
You seem to have gotten an ID ten T error.
(write it down and look at it)

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Sir Missalot on Nov 4th, 2021 at 8:07am
She's the reason they make decaf.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Sir Missalot on Nov 4th, 2021 at 8:11am
The company has a 2 drink at lunch maximum policy.  Technically, a pitcher of Long Island iced tea is just one drink. (5 shots of liquor per glass)

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Sir Missalot on Nov 4th, 2021 at 8:12am
You forgot your password over lunch?  I want what YOU had!

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Sir Missalot on Nov 4th, 2021 at 8:12am
sigh... good management is so hard to find.

Title: Re: Insults
Post by Sir Missalot on Nov 4th, 2021 at 8:13am
sorry, all.  It's Thursday and I really really wish it were Friday.

Slinging.org Forum » Powered by YaBB 2.5.2!
YaBB Forum Software © 2000-2022. All Rights Reserved.