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The First Time You Were Really Drunk (Read 204 times)
Rat Man
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The First Time You Were Really Drunk
Jul 25th, 2020 at 11:43am
 
   My first time was when I was sixteen.  Believe it or not I was with my family when it happened.  People were generally more liberal about drinking back then.  I could get served in many bars when I was just sixteen.  Anyway, this was a Republican Club picnic at Atco Lake.  We weren't Republicans but it was all the clams, corn on the cob, and beer you could consume for ten bucks a head so we were there.  It was Mom, Dad, little sister Donna, and oldest sister Marilyn and her family, and I.
    No one cared if the older kids drank beer so Donna and I helped ourselves.  It was Piels Beer, a Brooklyn brew.  It's pretty much your standard cheap American beer if you've never had it.  Donna had nine.  She was fourteen at the time and got blitzed.  I remember calling her a lightweight.  I had twenty seven.  I got plastered.
    One of the things I remember was entering an egg toss with my sister Marilyn.  I kept bumping into the other contestants waiting in line and dropped and broke my egg before the contest even started.
     Eventually I crapped out on the beach.  My little nieces, Julie an Millie, began dancing around me chanting "Uncle Gary's drunk, Uncle Gary's drunk!"  If I could have moved I would have smacked their little arses but I was incapacitated and they knew it.  Finally all of the many dozens of clams, (I ate like ten men back then)  ears of corn, and twenty seven Piels all came back up.  Ugh!  Luckily I was laying on the beach so it was easy to bury the mess. 
    Anyway that was my first real drunk.  This was followed several months later by my Santana concert debacle written about in another thread.  You'd think I'd have learned my lesson but there were many other instances of drinking to access in my life. Eventually, in my mid forties it just stopped feeling good.  I gradually stopped drinking completely. 
    So what was your first rip snorting drunk like? 
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Curious Aardvark
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Re: The First Time You Were Really Drunk
Reply #1 - Jul 27th, 2020 at 1:37pm
 
about 18 months old I believe.
My mum was making christmas puddings and the family story goes that I drank the jug with the brandy in.

And then started behaving oddly, so my mum took me to the doctors who after a brief examination, turned a stern gaze on her and said: 'Madam, this child is drunk !'

It was only when we got home that she realised the jug the brandy had been in was empty Smiley

The fact that you could just walk into a doctors surgery and see a doctor - tells you just how long ago that was !

50 years later and it's make an appointment for 3 weeks later. 
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Re: The First Time You Were Really Drunk
Reply #2 - Jul 27th, 2020 at 3:40pm
 
I don't remember the first time but I remember the worst. It was the worst one for a lot of reasons...

I went to a friend's place for their birthday with the intention of having a few beers and a generally chill time. I'm not entirely sure how many shots of vodka i had but I can say with some certainty it was "too many". It was the one and only (and will continue to be the only) time I have been truly blackout drunk. I remember "driving the porcelain bus" as the slang term goes and collapsing on a sofa and that's about it. The original plan was for me to walk home once the night wound down, but I couldn't feel my legs let alone use them so that plan was out the window. I crashed out on his sofa and slept there for the night and my one friend decided he should inform my girlfriend that I would be arriving home in the morning.

THIS is where the bad thing happened.

My friend phoned my girlfriend, but got no answer, because it was so late, so he left a message. This would have been fine except for what he left as a message to my worried girlfriend who was now sat up late wondering where I was.
"Hi, this is Joe's friend. I'm phoning about Joe. If you could phone me back soon. Thanks." (Or something to that effect). He left multiple messages like this.
My girlfriend thought I'd been hit by a car or was so drunk I was in hospital or something. She was absolutely petrified and couldn't even return the call she was so afraid to find out what had happened to me. When she eventually did phone back and found out I was not under the wheels of a 4x4, she was absolutely livid and probably would have thrown me under a car for being so stupid if I was there to throw.
When I dragged myself home the next day, she had written me a letter which should show you just how angry she was. I had a few choice words for my friend who so needlessly scared her when he could have just said "He can't make it home because of all the vodka and because he's stupid" but everything turned out alright in the end.

Kids, learn from me. Don't drink more than you know you can handle, inform people of where you are and do so clearly and concisely. Don't leave people vague messages that let's their imaginations run wild.
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Morphy
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Re: The First Time You Were Really Drunk
Reply #3 - Jul 27th, 2020 at 3:53pm
 
While I remember the first time I smoked cannabis vividly I do not remember the first time I got drunk. Weirdly enough.
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Rat Man
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Re: The First Time You Were Really Drunk
Reply #4 - Jul 27th, 2020 at 7:55pm
 
Curious Aardvark wrote on Jul 27th, 2020 at 1:37pm:
about 18 months old I believe.
My mum was making christmas puddings and the family story goes that I drank the jug with the brandy in.

And then started behaving oddly, so my mum took me to the doctors who after a brief examination, turned a stern gaze on her and said: 'Madam, this child is drunk !'

It was only when we got home that she realised the jug the brandy had been in was empty Smiley

The fact that you could just walk into a doctors surgery and see a doctor - tells you just how long ago that was !

50 years later and it's make an appointment for 3 weeks later. 


Now that's a funny story!
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Bill Skinner
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Re: The First Time You Were Really Drunk
Reply #5 - Jul 28th, 2020 at 4:49pm
 
Myself and another guy drank a couple bottles of MD20/20, which is a very cheap wine. 

I think I threw up a couple of toenails before the night was over. 

I haven't been able to stand wine since.

I'm like RatMan, I sorta quit drinking in my 40's, I decided to clean up my life so I dropped several bad habits then.

Oddly enough, drinking until I puked is something I haven't missed.
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Re: The First Time You Were Really Drunk
Reply #6 - Jul 28th, 2020 at 5:37pm
 
I drink, at most, 3 beers in a night nowadays and that's if I'm really feeling wild. Any tolerance for alcohol I used to have is long gone so one beer is enough to het me buzzed and really, one beer a month is all I need. Being drunk really isn't enjoyable anymore and any amount of alcohol messes with my sleep. Vivid dreams and super restless. Awful.
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Rat Man
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Re: The First Time You Were Really Drunk
Reply #7 - Jul 29th, 2020 at 1:39pm
 
Bill Skinner wrote on Jul 28th, 2020 at 4:49pm:
Myself and another guy drank a couple bottles of MD20/20, which is a very cheap wine. 

I think I threw up a couple of toenails before the night was over. 

I haven't been able to stand wine since.

I'm like RatMan, I sorta quit drinking in my 40's, I decided to clean up my life so I dropped several bad habits then.

Oddly enough, drinking until I puked is something I haven't missed.   


MD20/20 (we call it Mad Dog around here) was our official camping/fishing wine when I was a younger man.  Such strong wines are called fortified wines.  I generally liked the blue stuff.  It didn't taste good and would likely give you a hell of a hangover but the price was right and it did the job.  Many an outdoor drunken debauchery was fueled by Mad Dog.  Night Train was second behind Mad Dog for outdoor drunken activities.  The Night Train Express would lead you to a real hangover! 
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« Last Edit: Jul 29th, 2020 at 4:09pm by Rat Man »  
 
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Rat Man
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Re: The First Time You Were Really Drunk
Reply #8 - Jul 30th, 2020 at 12:43pm
 
   On another note, I don't feel that I'm more virtuous or better than anyone because I stopped drinking.  I miss the sensation I used to get from alcohol and I'm pissed that I can't enjoy it anymore.  I am envious of those who enjoy that happy buzz.  I would love to relax with a glass of JD on the rocks, a great single malt Scotch, a well crafted European brew, etc..  Though in the long run I'm absolutely better off for it, quitting drinking was more my body dictating terms to me than a choice.
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